Dumps Like a Truck
I have hit a new low!! I know you are sick of me saying that by now, but this time it’s true!! Well, let me just spill it. I went out to a nice Mexican Restaurant Friday night… it was good food. It was great food. The refried beans the chili relleno, the Chicken Fajitas which I always so wrong and get laughed out (It DOESN’T rhyme with Vagina??) the big basket of nachos and Salsa that was hotter than the freaking SUN.. but Oh sooo good. Well I made a pig of myself. And by the middle of the night I was paying the price. I fucking swear, you would have thought I lived in a lighthouse, from all the Foghorn noises you could hear emanating from my bedroom. I mean I’ve had gas before.. but this was beyond gas. This was Olga, one woman Greenhouse Effect. I was up and down all night to the toilet. And pretty soon there was nothing left to empty out of me. So why is it that in the morning I wake up to rip another one… I misjudge my own ass’s intent.. and instead of cutting the cheese I part the chocolate sea right there in my own bed!!! I shit my own sheets. My nightgown the floor by the bed… everything.. a big chocolate runny puddle of Olga’s Friday Night Fiesta… Thank god my son had left for work already (we share a bed for the time being. Long story). He complained all night about Mama’s tooting and pooting… he woulda been scarred for life if he’d seen me use the mattress like a giant diaper. WELP. I think it’s time to do some laundry finally, don’t you? Yes I know. I’m gross. Suffer!
OLGA 1 888 896 6205
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